Number 11 on the Suck It List: Laundry

I’ve had it with laundry. We are a family of only three (3!!!!)  and as I’m typing this we have laundry in various states all over the house:

  • Dirty
  • Wet (and clean!) but still is the washing machine
  • Dry (and wrinkled!) in the dryer
  • Dry  (and even more wrinkled!) in the laundry basket
  • Dry and folded in the laundry basket
  • Dry and hanging on the clothes line in the back yard

The laundry is never done. Never. Even when I stare into the depths of the laundry hamper and see the bottom* I know there are dirty clothes lurking all over the house. Demetri leaves his socks on the floor. Zoey has started stock piling dirty clothes under the couch and behind the bathroom door. The other day I found four pairs of Minnie Mouse panties stashed between the couch cushions. As I was pulling them out, Zoey advised me, “Oh, Mommy, you don’t want those–they’re dirty!” And then I gave a wonderful lecture about how we don’t just wear clothes once, we wash them and wear again and again. She looked at me serenely and said, “You don’t seem to do your washing job very much so it’s a good thing I have so many dresses.” Touche, my little friend, touche.

Whenever I’m at home, there’s this little nagging thought that follows me around, constantly tugging at the hem of my mind, “You should be doing laundry. Washing, folding, putting away. Laundrylaundrylaundry.” The thought grates on me through everything I do. By the time Demetri gets home at night I’m ready to throw my self at his feet and wail, “I didn’t do the laundry!!! I admit it!!! I’m a terrible person!!!  I’m a horrible wife!!!! Have mercy one me!!!!” At which point Demetri loosens his tie and says, “Why are you this upset about laundry? It’s not your job.” And then he walks through the kitchen and starts a load of laundry.

This is a nice and kind thing. However, all I can think is, “OHMYGOD! Howarewegoingtoremembertoputthelaundryinthedryer and HOW WILL IT EVER GET DONE???” Because, more times than not, neither of us will remember to put the clothes in the dryer and I’ll find them a few days later, damp and moldy, stuck to the sides of the washer.

Clearly, I have issues. I mean, it’s not like I have to use a washing board and scrub everything by hand. I don’t even have to walk down a flight of stairs. The washing machine and dryer are on the main floor of our house. And yet I let the laundry sit in its various piles and mock me. I often narrow myt eyes and curse at it as I walk by. Please note: this actually does not help the laundry get clean, dry, or put away. It doesn’t even make me feel better.

Yes, I have issues. I should work on them. But definitely not while doing the laundry.

*You know, the two times it happened.


17 thoughts on “Number 11 on the Suck It List: Laundry

  1. joslyne Post author

    A chocolate valet? Is that a thing? How can I get one? Where? I need one. Now. Like, right now!

  2. Corey

    See, now, I LOVE doing laundry. It’s easy. I pick up dirty clothes, toss them in the machine, turn that bad boy on, then veg in front of the TV watching college basketball/college football/the MECUM auto auction on Velocity, while the washing machine rumbles away in the laundry room. Then it buzzes. I pause my show, switch it to the dryer, then sit on my butt again . . another hour goes by. Then the dryer buzzes, and I get off my butt again and fold the clothes. Somehow, by the grace of God, this is the moment when Niki waltzes through the room and says “Oh, thank you for doing the laundry . . . I’m just sewing and you’re being all productive on a Saturday!” I get a kiss on the cheek. She waltzes out of the room, I finish folding, and sit back down for another hour of bliss while the machines do their job . . .

    Often, spending an afternoon like that is THE MOST PRODUCTIVE THING I DO ALL WEEK.


  3. joslyne Post author

    Well . . . when you put it that way it doesn’t sound so bad. Especially if rooting for KU. 😉 Except I can’t imagine being able to sit, uninterrupted, for a couple hours. MOMMY! MOMMY! MOMMY! *sigh*

  4. Mikel

    I HATE LAUNDRY. I’m a family of 1 and I can never seem to get it all done. I can deal with the clothes but the towels and linen never gets caught up. When I had a house cleaner I did better with laundry bc I didn’t feel so burnt out by the cleaning. Also, I felt like a slug hanging out in my bedroom while they cleaned.

  5. Lindy

    the *only* thing worse than laundry is mopping the floor. at least with laundry it looks and smells clean. mop the floor, spill some water, wipe it up, FILTHY CLOTH! how is it even possible??!?!

    1. joslyne Post author

      yeah, it seems like technology and progress has not quite done its part for floor mopping. There must be a better way . . .

  6. Tyffany

    The cozy book nook is awesome. I want one for home and one for school. … good moment, hmmmm, I skipped, following precise 5 year old instructions, all the way home from Safeway, carrying peaches and wearing flipflops.

  7. Tyffany

    Meant that cooment for your last post obviously…similar to Corey laundry, for me, is guilt free TV time..probably why I do most of my laundry late at night. The part that I put off as long as possible is putting all the clean clothes away.

  8. Laura

    Hehe…We are a family of five and don’t have a washer or dryer…You wanna talk about laundry stress.,…

  9. Laura

    No…I hand wash everything and then line dry them all. Every day. Three hours a day! No, seriously, we’ve been using the washer at our rental because we have the other place for a few more weeks. But I haven’t used a dryer since KY,

  10. katelikestocreate

    Just about to leave a comment when I read that last one and had my mind blown. Oh, wait – just read it a second time and realized she was joking! I like to think of laundry as a machine in a factory with different stages in the cycle. I just have to keep it oiled and keep the wheels turning. This way I don’t get discouraged about the fact it’s never done. Sometimes things back up at a certain stage and I have to look at why that is (eg too many clothes to fit in drawers creates a backlog of clean clothes to sort and fold. This means it’s time to cull!)
    As you can see, I spend far more time than is healthy analyzing my laundry habits. I think it’s turning into an obsession!

    1. joslyne Post author

      Wow! This is amazing! Sadly, I am horrible at stuff like keeping things oiled, watering plants, etc. etc. Although yesterday I did sumer-ize Zoey’s drawers and cleaned out all the winter stuff. So — PROGRESS! Thanks for reading and commeting! 🙂


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s