I often see other moms — in person, on Facebook, where ever — and these other moms often look put together. I suspect they have showered and brushed their hair. And maybe even folded and put away their laundry before every piece of clean clothing becomes a wrinkled mess from sitting in the laundry basket for 3 days. Also, they seem to have a faint and lovely glow. Hopefully, this glow comes from make-up and not from the joyous fulfillment that motherhood provides. If it’s the latter . . . well. I give up. These moms, they are also wearing cute clothes. Clothes that seem to, you know, fit. And jewelry. Beaded necklaces, silver bracelets, dangly earrings. These put-together moms seem like they’re . . . winning. Winning the battle against sleep depravation, toddler tantrums, and general momness.
I, on the other hand, am not so much winning as slogging along. I am the epitome of frumpiness. My hair is sort of straggly. My clothes are either too big or pull too tight in unflattering places. It goes without saying that everything is wrinkled. No make-up. No jewelry. I do, however, shower. Occasionally. And sometimes I even remember to brush my hair.
Some of my disheveledness is by choice. I often don’t invest much time in my appearance (like applying make-up or flat ironing my hair) because I would rather be doing other things — sleeping, picnicking, eating chocolate. I don’t need to be matchy-matchy every time I go out. A hat and a pont-tail often suit me just fine. I’m OK wearing yoga pants to the grocery store.
The thing is, even when I try to look put-together, I still somehow fail. I get deodorant streaks on the side of my navy dress. And I don’t notice them until we have left the house. There’s part of a smooshed granola bar on the butt of my grey slacks. My hair won’t stay in place. The blush, which I thought I was applying on my cheek bones at home in the dim light of the bathroom, now seems to be smeared randomly all over my face. . Somehow I only have lipstick on my bottom lip. I couldn’t find my other black sandal so I had to wear the brown ones that are missing a buckle. I forgot to put on a belt and my pants are falling off. And there is just no way that one can seem put-together while constantly hitching up one’s pants. NO. WAY.
So . . . how do you do it? How do you look so put-together? While I await your answers I might go fold some laundry. Laundry that’s been in the dryer for 3 days.